Would you believe that, according to the APA, 68% of Americans say they feel fatigued during the holidays? Many feel extra irritable during the “happiest time of the year.” This is supposed to be the  “merry & bright” season. I want to help you have the best holiday experience you can, given the current circumstances, and to end 2020 in a better way than expected.

Now be honest with yourself now for a moment and think about what your intentions are this holiday season?

Are you scrambling to 

  •  Fit it all in the schedule
  •  Get it all done before the deadline
  • Have it all perfect 
  • Make sure everyone else is all happy at family gatherings

Instead of choosing overwhelm, be very intentional as to choose joy. Your thoughts about the holidays determine your experience of them. You can absolutely enjoy your holidays, no matter what they look like in 2020.  Because COVID can not take away your joy. Only you can take away your joy.

Now, Repeat after me:

  • I choose to be present, I am here now and it is the perfect place to be. 
  • I choose to connect with more people. I bring positive energy to the room. 
  • I choose to laugh more. I am fun.
  • I choose to slow down. I am enjoying my life.
  • I choose to love on purpose. I am loved and I love others well. 
  • I choose to appreciate people. I am grateful. 

Say these affirmations as many times as you need it throughout the day. If you are at a family gathering and feel anxiety starting to creep in, excuse yourself to the restroom, close your eyes, take a deep breath and reset your intentions: “when I open my eyes, my new intentions are……..” 

  • We want to be having fun, so plan things early. 
  • Since the emotional needs of this time of year is high, be sure to schedule in time for plenty of self-care first! You need to be your #1 priority, schedule your non-negotiables first like quiet time and let your family know what and when those times are so that they understand what is important for you. 
  • Ask for help. I know you might be THE leader of the family, the lioness who thrives being the leader and promise to do it all, but if you are the ONLY one doing it all, be sure to delegate when necessary and learn to say no. 
  • If someone close to you has recently died or you can’t be with loved ones for other reasons, realize that it’s normal to feel sadness and grief. It’s OK to take time to cry or express your feelings. You can’t force yourself to be happy just because it’s the holiday season. It’s absolutely ok to acknowledge your feelings, just know that it is temporary and choose to believe everything will be ok. 
  • This year, we will all need to be more flexible. The holidays don’t have to be perfect or just like last year. As families change and grow, traditions and rituals often change anyway. Choose a few to hold on to, and be open to creating new ones. Especially this year, it’s OK to meet virtually on a video call. Even though your holiday plans may look different this year, you can still find ways to celebrate. Remember, this is your life!
  • Don’t let holiday shopping ruin your holidays. Nowadays, “Christmas creep” is the term used to describe retailers who extend the Christmas shopping season by starting earlier and earlier. We have been manipulated by marketers, advertisers, and retailers to shop more and more and more. The artificial manipulation to change our desires to create the perfect holiday experience with magical memories for our family and kids. Shopping promised to meet that need, but in reality, it detracts from it. Retail promises the perfect Christmas, but it may actually ruin it instead. Shopping can add financial stress, unnecessary mental stress, time wasted on our lives, and make us focus on the wrong things. So remember that Christmas is always about the true essence of family, and loved ones, and home, not materialistic retail items. 

Learn to recognize your holiday triggers, whether it’s financial pressures or personal demands, know what triggers you so you can combat them before they lead to a meltdown. With a little planning and definitely positive thinking, you can absolutely find peace and joy during the holidays.

Best wishes for you, may your holidays be filled with love, happiness, and success.

May the festive season bring only cheer and blessings to you and your family.

 

 

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